Our unity is a gift, freely given and already secured. It was purchased by Jesus through his sacrifice and granted to us by the Holy Spirit. This unity isn’t something we need to earn or strive to achieve. It’s already ours in Christ by virtue of the fact that God has made us one in him.

One of the challenging things about the Bible is that it doesn’t just command us to act a certain way toward each other; it commands us to feel a certain way toward each other.

Take a look around. We’re a bunch of very different people. We have different personalities, different quirks, and different beliefs on all kinds of matters. It would be very easy for us to split apart over any number of things.

Add to the fact that we don’t get to choose who comes to church. We’re kind of stuck with each other. Not everyone who joins a church is our kind of person. Every church I know includes some challenging or socially awkward people.

And the Bible doesn’t command us to only act well toward each other. It commands us to feel a certain way toward each other.

In other words, the Bible doesn’t command us to treat each other well with gritted teeth. It demands a certain attitude. A good example is Ephesians 4:31-32, which says:

Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children.

Notice the combination of attitudes and actions. Get rid of bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and slander, and all malice. Don’t let them take root in your heart, because if they’re in your heart they will eventually come out.

Get rid of bad attitudes, and then adopt some good attitudes. He talks about being kind, but the kindness isn’t just an action. The kindness comes from being tenderhearted. Tenderheartedness stems from deep compassion within, not just superficial politeness. It reflects an internal feeling rather than merely outward actions.

Paul is saying that “feelings of bitterness, resentment, and a desire for retaliation must give way to a warm and tender heart” (Clinton Arnold).

To which we might say: Are you kidding me, Paul? It’s hard enough for me to act kindly toward difficult people. And now I’m supposed to feel warmly and tenderly toward them too?

Yes, Paul says, but we need to back up to the start of chapter 4 to see how this works.

A Turning Point

Ephesians 4:1 says, “I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called…”

The “therefore” marks a turning point in Ephesians. Up to this point, Paul has been talking about theology. The first three chapters of Ephesians are all about what God has done. God has chosen us and sealed us with the Holy Spirit to the praise of his glory. We were dead in sins, but God graciously made us alive in Christ and made us one with former enemies in Christ. He’s made us members of his body, so that we are now the new dwelling place together for the Spirit. This became the driving force of Paul’s life and transformed the church into a theater of God’s glory.

I like how James Montgomery Boice puts it:

With the possible exception of Romans, no New Testament letter contains a stronger or more exhilarating presentation of theology. Chapters 1–3 have spoken of predestination and election, adoption and redemption, the work of the Holy Spirit, rebirth, the work of God in joining people from all nations and all walks of life together in the one holy body of Christ, the church. This is so marvelous a section that Paul ends chapter 3 with a doxology.

That doxology says:

Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.
Ephesians 3:20-21)

In light of these profound theological truths, Paul calls us to live accordingly. He shifts from doctrine to duty, creed to conduct, and from theology to the practical realities of a transformed life. As Boice said, “He is telling us that doctrinal ‘input’ must be matched by an equal, practical ‘output’ of that doctrine in our lives.”

It’s important to notice something about what Paul teaches. In Ephesians 1:10, Paul reveals God’s ultimate purpose: “to unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth.” This points to a future day when the entire universe and the whole church will be brought into perfect unity under Christ, the supreme head of all. While this cosmic unity awaits its full realization, Paul emphasizes in chapters 2 and 3 that this work has already begun. Through Christ, God has united Jews and Gentiles—people from vastly different ethnic, social, and religious backgrounds—into one new humanity. These individuals had different personalities, priorities, and backgrounds, yet they were united in their mission to achieve the church’s goal of spiritual and cultural transformation, as described in the opening chapters of this epistle.

In other words, loving each other from the heart isn’t incidental to the gospel. It’s at the core of the gospel. It’s an essential part of what Christ came to do.

Three Truths About Unity

In light of the gospel that Paul has expounded in chapters 1 to 3, listen to what Paul says in chapter 4:

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