I’m not a great fan of shaking hands across the pews at the beginning of a service or acting out motions for children’s songs. My personal version of liturgical dance is limited to standing up and sitting down. I’m glad, however, when a service pushes me out of my introvert’s worship comfort zone.

I tend to feel guilty after church.

It’s not the sermon but the coffee fellowship after the service that makes me feel uncomfortable. I usually wait on the edge of the group and try to talk to one person. If that doesn’t work out, I retreat to the church library, where I’m sure to run into someone I know well or find the company of a good book. And then I feel guilty for not being more gregarious. Shouldn’t it be easier for me to elbow my way into the crowd at my church and join the conversation?

According to Susan Cain’s recent book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking, I shouldn’t feel so guilty. In fact, I probably represent the feelings of 30 to 50 percent of the population. Psychologists call us introverts.

Cain describes introversion as a “preference for environments that are not overstimulating.” By contrast, an extrovert loves being in a group and finds energy in constant activity. At work, introverts tend to be slow and steady; extroverts multitask while multitasking. It is true that introverts can be shy. But they don’t dislike people. Introverts prefer calm settings, a conversation with a few people, and time to reflect before speaking.

Our modern economy and individualistic culture, says Cain, have favored the Extrovert Ideal, a personality type based on the model salesman who looks you in the eye and speaks with warm confidence about a new product. That ideal in turn causes us to view the ideal leader as a charismatic person blessed with the ability to decide quickly and communicate effectively.

By contrast, introverts have accomplished some of the most creative work alone, collaborating only when they had results to share. Consider Steve Wozniak, who worked at Hewlett-Packard and was part of a computer club but invented the original Apple computer on his own. Cain also notes that quiet and calm introverts such as Rosa Parks and Gandhi developed courageous consciences that refused to budge. Reading Cain’s book, I’m surprised anyone would want to be an extrovert.

Cain also presents the conversation she had with Adam McHugh, a pastor who’s written extensively on introversion in the church. Says McHugh, “The evangelical culture ties together faithfulness with extroversion. The emphasis is on community, on participation in more and more programs and events, on meeting more and more people.” As a result, many introverted evangelicals—and pastors—feel a sense of shame and spiritual failure if they are not as involved, engaged, or vocal as other church members.

Thanks to its focus on doctrinal knowledge, calmly ordered worship, and behind-the-scenes committee work, the Reformed tradition has been good for introverts. But as worship styles change, are the introverts among us feeling less at home or even leaving the church? And wouldn’t Reformed extroverts argue that the church still has a long way to go?

I began to wonder how I could become more involved in church life. What might help introverts and extroverts worship and serve together in the church? Here are some ideas.

1. Get Over It

2. Introverted Pastors

3. Mentoring

4. “Ambivert” Worship

5. Conflict Resolution

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