Friends, whether we have been offended or we have offended others, if we know there is opposition or tension between us and another, go and be reconciled! Maybe the other will not be willing, but we shouldn’t assume anything until we have tried. Do what you know to be right and if the other refuses, then you have attempted reconciliation, and the Lord will have to deal with the other’s heart. Let us not allow pride to keep us from obeying the words of Christ. 

“Therefore if you are presenting your offering at the altar, and there remember that your brother had something against you, leave your offering there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and present your offering.” —Matt 5:23–24

Today, at least where I live, there are churches everywhere, ranging from Baptist to Presbyterian, Lutheran, Episcopalian, a variety of Pentecostal churches, and Reformed churches. This can be seen as a blessing (for those churches that are firmly established in Scripture) and a curse at the same time. What I mean by “curse” is that if a person or family gets frustrated or upset at their current church, they can readily move to the next without hindrance. They are free from having to do the difficult things and talk about their frustrations, or if it’s a situation of sin on their part, they do not have to be confronted—they just move to the next church. How often is reconciling our differences preferred rather than just avoiding them? For some, it seems better to leave rather than to do what our Lord calls us to do, which is to reconcile. 

Reconciliation in the Church

We have had people come and go over the years and much of the time people will leave without discussing their concerns or reasons for departure. It’s easier not to discuss things. It’s difficult to be confronted with areas where one may be espousing error or to be confronted with behavior that is unbecoming. Many do not do well when it comes to working through their differences. When we do not do that, our frustrations can grow, and we inevitably distance ourselves from those in the church and often fall into practices such as using social media as a means to “rebuke” one another. Early in my walk with Christ, I too, fell into that. It was immature on my part but I did it nonetheless because I lacked the courage to actually speak to the individual(s) myself. It was easier to make general statements, “rants,” or quotes toward others while not having to confront them face to face. 

We have seen this throughout the years at our church, and it is something that all who belong to Christ must move past and grow out of, and we need to help each other in that process. If we are to obey our Lord and go to one another when we have an “ought” or when we know that someone has an ought with us, then failing to do so is a sign of disobedience and a sign of spiritual immaturity. What are we saying when we fail to do what Christ says to do in instances like this? We end up making a general post on social media or posting an article that opposes this one or that one, declaring that this is the final “say.”

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