“Conflict is everywhere people are, and it seems to be escalating. The incivility of our culture is having a toxic effect on ministry and congregations. The Faith Communities Today survey of 14,000 congregations found that 75 percent of churches have experienced some level of conflict. At any given time, one-fifth of congregations are in active conflict.”

Ask any minister, “What is the worst part of your job?” and nearly all will tell you, “Conflict.”

Ask any congregation member what they like least about their church experience, and most will answer the same.

Conflict is everywhere people are, and it seems to be escalating. The incivility of our culture is having a toxic effect on ministry and congregations.

The Faith Communities Today survey of 14,000 congregations found that 75 percent of churches have experienced some level of conflict. At any given time, one-fifth of congregations are in active conflict.

With our depressed economy and seismic job losses, many lives are deeply stressed. It comes as no surprise that churches are experiencing more conflict than ever.

Particularly in these circumstances, regarding conflict as a blessing seems foolish and naïve. Is it possible, however, to learn to manage our conflict constructively?

Church leaders are wise to address conflict early and proactively before it escalates and becomes divisive. The issue is not whether you will have conflict, but what you will do with it.

Following biblical commands means handling conflict with openness, compassion and as much transparency as possible.

Speaking up early, rather than sweeping disagreement under the carpet, avoids a host of problems that over time can leave a congregation divided and deeply wounded.

Conflict within a congregation can begin as a simple difference of opinion over worship styles, carpet color or youth activities, or it can be as shame-filled as division over clergy sexual misconduct or staff financial mismanagement.

While it always causes discomfort and it can be downright painful, conflict within a congregation can be a catalyst for healthy growth.

In my experience, it is the rare adult who makes any significant life change without discomfort and pain. Throughout the Bible, God uses conflict to grow his people.

Paul, Peter, Martha, Mary, David and Jeremiah are examples of heroes who learned through the ache of failure and conflict.

The letters to the early church are filled with instructions for managing conflict. We are not the first to walk this way.

Conflicts and crises make excellent teachers. They often lead to new and better ways of doing things.

If a youth leader’s misbehavior results in a safer policy for adult interaction with teens, the youth ministry is strengthened.

If employee theft inspires a smart policy that minimizes risk, congregational trust is enhanced.

When a bitter argument gives way to thoughtful conversation, community is built. At the Center for Healthy Churches, we believe there are several keys to navigating conflict.

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