If you’re a man, read the Scriptures on what men and husbands are to be like, and aspire to be such a man. If you are a woman, read what the Bible says women and wives are to be like, and work at being such a woman. Then, read what the Lord says the opposite sex should be, so you know whom you should marry.

The search for intimacy is deeply personal for every Christian, although our emotions may easily muddle up clear guidance that the Lord has given to us in the Bible about such matters. This article aims to help single Christians in the task of thinking biblically about singleness and marriage.

Lord, why am I still single?

The Lord has different specific reasons as to why some Christians are single. He has a different plan for each of us. Perhaps it’s because of your birth (Matthew 19:12). Or the Lord may give you the unwanted trial of singleness for you to grow in your dependence on Him (James 1:12). Your plans for an earthly family might be halted to get you to focus on the Lord’s mission for growing His eternal family.

Loneliness and lust.

To those struggling with loneliness, the Lord might want you to pay more attention to investing in your existing relationships with His people. Lust might be your besetting sin—our loving heavenly Father would guard His precious son or daughter from falling into your hands until you flee and cut off that sin from your life.

Aim to please.

Although we may not know the specific reason why God has kept us single, we know our aim is to please Him. We may please Him better in our singleness, and so avoiding the earthly distractions of marriage (1 Corinthians 7:32-35).

However, it’s not a sin to marry, and the apostle Paul advises that it’s better to marry than to burn with passion (1 Corinthians 7:9). The Lord promised to bless you with the people you need if you put Him first—so the Lord will bless you with a wife too, if He knows that is who you need (Matthew 19:29). It’s wise to prepare now for marriage if you have that desire.

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