Scripture is full of advice on marriage and family. The nuclear family is created by God. Father, mother, and children. When those in the home follow God’s Word and plan, the family works well. When that plan is broken, so are the families.

With the disintegration of the nuclear family, an ever-increasing divorce rate, routine single-parent families, and a host of external negative influences, it takes intentional parenting to withstand the onslaught of evil set against our children in today’s world. While Christian parents are fighting an uphill battle against a culture that would undermine their efforts, a strong family identity and sense of belonging can serve to strengthen and bolster our kids against a hostile world. 

I am a product of a lack of family identity. The oldest of four, I became immensely depressed around nine years old. Raised in a dysfunctional home, insecurity dominated my siblings and me. I was determined to avoid escaping to alcohol or drugs out of sheer fear of being out of control. As my family disintegrated, I took advantage of a career in modeling through family contacts, but after seeing the dark side of Hollywood I decided instead to become a nurse. Due to a lack of parental involvement, I was soon assisting with abortions as a 19-year-old student nurse, trying to cope with life. I longed for a family but was also looking for God – if He existed. I prayed that He did and that He’d show me who He was.

Thankfully, at age 21, I became a Christian and my life drastically changed. Graduating from nursing school and working as an oncology specialist and public health nurse gave me numerous opportunities to observe families. Instead of the secular child development and psychiatry classes I took in school, my Bible became my foundation directing me in God’s will in family life. Marrying a wonderful seminary student also yielded even more experience in counseling and intervening in family crises. Now as a nurse, mother, grandmother, and pastor’s wife for almost 37 years, helping people work through their trials and depending on God is a normal and joyful part of my life.

The Problem

According to the latest compilation of CDC statistics in 2022 citing studies from 2016- 2019, the suicide rate has spiked dramatically in every children’s age group. 1 in 6 children in the US aged 2–8 years had a diagnosed mental, behavioral, or developmental disorder. ADHD, anxiety problems, behavior problems, and depression are the most commonly diagnosed mental disorders in children. Estimates for ever having a diagnosis among children aged 3-17 years, in 2016-19, are ADHD 9.8% (approximately 6.0 million), Anxiety 9.4% (approximately 5.8 million), Behavior problems 8.9% (approximately 5.5 million) and Depression 4.4% (approximately 2.7 million). Often these conditions commonly occur together. Adolescents aged 12-17 years have major depressive episodes, substance abuse and rapidly increasing suicides. (1) This is all before COVID. Now those numbers have grown exponentially with children commonly sent to psychiatric hospitals. In working at two psychiatric facilities myself, I found many of the treatments sadly lacking. Some treatments made problems much worse.

Never in this country’s recent history have children been so confused, benignly neglected, and exposed to so much evil. The increasing selfishness of people, causing the breakdown of the American family, leaves deep scars and insecurities among children. They are sought out by groups like “Satan Clubs,” and the LGBTQ “community” openly threatens that they’re “coming after” our children, Planned Parenthood for early and perverse sex education, and pornographic books in schools and public libraries. Additionally, the undermining of parental authority is increasingly hindering parents’ ability to be aware of unsafe environments.

The Solution

What can be done? Could a strong family identity help in bolstering the defenses against the assails of the world?

Family identity is identifying with one’s family first. This foundation of safety and security for children teaches them who they are, where they come from, and how to live.

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