It is important to distinguish between social convention and nature but not everything is a convention to be deconstructed. Nature remains. The differences between boys and girls cannot be reduced to social constructs. Boys and girls are obviously different biologically, even if it is not currently fashionable to say so. As a boy of 56 years, a brother to two sisters, the husband of one wife, and the father of two daughters, my experience is that there are real, innate differences. We experience the world differently. We relate to others differently.

Roseanne is back on television and to great success. The pilot for the renewal of the twenty-year old series did so well in the overnight ratings that season 2 has already been picked up. Most of the attention has focused on the fact that the show, which features the working-class Connor family has Trump supporters in it. What I have not seen discussed, however, is that Darlene (one of the original kids in the series) has a child of her own, Mark played by Ames McNamara whose character is presented as preferring to dress like a girl. Mom is divorced and Grandma (Roseanne) and Grandpa (played by John Goodman) are torn. They love Darlene and Mark but they know that sending him off to school dressed like a girl is bound to create problems and, of course, it does.

It is in the nature of sitcoms to create and resolve tension. In that tension is both pathos and comedy and the writers, actors, and actresses portrayed it well. They helped us to empathize with a young who clearly needs attention, who apparently does not have a father active in his life and who gets attention by being, as they say now, transgressive of social norms. The show also captured the natural impulse of a single-mom to defend her child and struggle of Grandma and Grandpa to try to fix things.

As I watched the episode I wondered to myself how many elementary-aged boys in this country are now dressing like girls. This NYT article from 2012 caused a stir when it was published because it claimed that it is perfectly normal for boys to be “gender fluid” and to cross-dress. Of course that is utter rubbish but it was re-assuring not to find a flood of related articles in the interim signaling that this is a major trend. Still, that ABC decided to explore this theme in a mainstream television series is worrying.

As a parent, I worry about young children in the entertainment business generally and the emotional and psychological effects of playing a child with “gender dysphoria.” As attractive as this device is for the writers, how is it not propaganda or social catechesis? We are apparently being told that the new normal is that it is perfectly acceptable for nine-year old boys to wear dresses to school and that anyone who expresses concern is a bigot.

The underlying message is that social norms are completely arbitrary and should be transgressed. The problem is that it is true that some social norms are relatively arbitrary but not all are. In 2011 an article in The Smithsonian reminded us that it was common in the 19th century for boys to wear something like a baptismal gown (FDR is pictured in his) until as late as 6 or 7 years old. The author also observes that pink and blue as assigned to girls and boys is a relatively recent and commercially driven convention. During WWII women went to work in factors and wore trousers.

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