Don’t say anything negative about someone that you wouldn’t say to them. Simply put, if it’s a matter of enough concern to share with another, it’s a matter of concern to share with the person in question. If it’s not, it shouldn’t be shared. Redirect others’ gossip with a gentle query about the intent. “Have you spoken to them about this concern you have?” is a great way to nip gossip in the bud. “I don’t think you should share this with me if you’re not prepared to share it with them.”

The Lord loves a straight shooter. How do I know this? Because this is the embodiment of the wisdom imparted in Proverbs, including this helpful little gem: “Put away from you crooked speech, and put devious talk far from you” (4:24).

Crooked speech is talk that isn’t straight. It is bowed, off-kilter, circuitous, meandering. There are a few examples we could name, including outright lying and even hypocritical living, but one of the most glaring examples of crooked speech that is practically epidemic in the church is the sin of gossip. But what is gossip?

One reason gossip can be so difficult to define is that it so often masquerades as something more mundane, perhaps even beneficent. I’m sure you have witnessed plenty of prayer requests shared on someone’s behalf that seemed to include unnecessary details or salacious information. You’ve probably heard your share of “words of concern” that bordered on insinuation or improper speculation. Maybe you’ve offered such words yourself. I know I have.

If we had to boil down gossip to a straightforward definition, we might say that gossip is saying anything about someone that you wouldn’t say to them. That at least captures the way gossip violates Proverbs 4:24.

So how do you know if you’re hearing (or sharing) gossip? Here are some clues as to the various motives that fuel gossip.

Malice

When we are voicing criticism or accusation of another person to a third party, we must take great care first of all that we have the other person’s actual best interest in mind. If we really do suspect a sin issue, the responsible thing to do is to lovingly, gently confront the subject of our concern.

In Romans 1, Paul actually connects gossip as a character trait—“they are gossips” (v. 29), not simply that they commit gossip—to deceit and maliciousness. Gossip is a sin no matter where you find it, whether it’s in the aisles at church or in the aisles of the grocery store. But it is especially egregious in a church setting, where gossip works the satanic ploy of undermining the unity of the Spirit and Christ’s call to love one another as He has loved us. Gossip is anti-gospel, and therefore it is representative of the Antichrist.

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