I’m tired of watching so many people struggle in silence, unsure if their grief is valid or worth someone else’s time and attention (it is!). I believe invisible grief is unique enough from how we traditionally think about the topic that we could use a different approach.

There is no path through this life that does not involve at least some measure of grief. This world is so broken that at different times and in different ways, grief affects us all. Some grief flows from what we loved and lost, but other grief flows from what has never been and may never be. This second kind is what Drew Hensley refers to as “invisible grief,” and it is the subject of his book by that title—a book for those who know the pain of unmet desires and unseen sorrows.

Hensley is no doubt correct when he says that “Grief is most commonly viewed through the lens of loss of life or loss of relationship (such as divorce).” But less visible forms of grief are no less real. What does invisible grief look like? 

It can take many forms. For example, it could be singleness for those who desire marriage; it could be infertility for those who desire children; it could be abandonment that prevents certain relationships; it could be a mental or physical chronic illness or disability that prevents you from pursuing certain aspects of life and community; or it could be a combination of these. It could be a series of circumstances that have brought you to a place you never expected to be and have kept you in a place you never wanted to stay. 

Read More