Pastors and elders should relate to the sheep humbly and with ongoing personal repentance. When one thinks about the responsibility of being a faithful shepherd of God’s people, it is awe-inspiring and, in a very real sense, terrifying. The stakes are high, and shepherds will be called to account for their work in shepherding the people of God. We will be called to account for our teaching (James 3:1) and for our spiritual leadership and shepherding (Heb. 13:17).

How should pastors and elders relate to the sheep? In a brief article such as this, we cannot cover all the facets of faithful pastoral care, but perhaps we can establish some fundamental principles to guide and instruct both shepherds and sheep concerning the proper character of the pastoral relationship. Let us consider four fundamental aspects of how pastors and elders should relate to those under their care.

First, pastors and elders should act purposefully and with gospel intentionality. As well-meaning pastors and elders, we are often content to relate to church members in ways that simply promote our general likability. We talk about work, what the kids are up to, shows we have watched, or the ball game from the past weekend. Now, there is nothing wrong with talking about such things. These kinds of conversations can play an important part in building genuine relationships. The problem is that sometimes our conversations never get beyond these kinds of easy, natural, and safe topics. And while such safe conversations may promote a sense that the pastor is likable, they generally fail to stir up and promote the genuine spiritual maturity that the Scriptures call for.

The Apostle Paul presents his pastoral purpose in various ways, but his language reveals an overriding gospel-centered intent and purpose. He labored to “make the word of God fully known” (Col. 1:25) so that he might “present everyone mature in Christ” (v. 28). He desired to see “Christ formed” in his readers (Gal. 4:19), and he longed to see “all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God,” achieving maturity, “to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ” (Eph. 4:13). Paul was laboring not for people’s general approval but for their salvation and sanctification. Pastors and elders should have the same goals for the sheep in their care, and with these goals in mind, they must ultimately direct conversations to topics of repentance, faith in Christ, and new obedience. These kinds of deeper spiritual conversations require purposefulness and a pastoral willingness to initiate and take risks, often through thoughtful and direct questions and faithful persistence. Therefore, pastors and elders must pursue relationships with gospel purposefulness with the express goal of fostering spiritual maturity in the sheep under their care.

A second way that pastors and elders should relate to their flock is fervently and with genuine love. When Paul spoke of his desire to see Christ formed in the Galatians, he spoke of himself as one “in the anguish of childbirth” (Gal. 4:19). Paul’s ministry was not simply one of correct theological priorities but one of personal intensity and affection of the deepest order. He loved those in his care, and he longed for their spiritual welfare.

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