First of all, most of us want to think that others are entirely wrong whenever they bring any criticism to us. We love to turn a blind eye to our own sin. Second, most of us love to blow up over what part of a criticism might be wrong, rather than welcome what part of it is right. Third, we are all ready to write off criticisms that are brought to our attention when it comes from someone with whom we have not had a close relationship.

Giving or receiving criticism is one of the most painful yet most necessary parts of a believer’s life in a fallen world. It is one of the difficult aspects of Gospel-ministry. No one likes to be criticized–and most of us do not enjoy having to confront others. If we were honest with ourselves, we would have to admit that we would rather criticize others by means of sinful gossip and slander than to go to them in a forthright and loving manner.

Our aversion to criticism often comes from the fact that we all have far more sinful pride alive in our hearts that we would ever want to admit. Joel Beeke once explained how most of us so often respond to criticism:

“Criticism will come; and when we don’t respond to it rightly, it will promote smugness, it promotes an unforgiving spirit, it promotes backbiting on our part. We tend to judge those who judge us. We tend to return evil for evil. We end up doing to others what others do to us. We binocularize their faults, bring them seven times closer and, when it comes to our own thoughts–because we become so self-defensive–we turn the binoculars around and we make our faults seven times smaller.”

Additionally, we sometimes fail to receiving criticism in humility because of the manner or deliver by which others have brought criticisms to us. In similar fashion, we fuel others’ rejection of our criticisms of them by not bringing them to them in a loving, wise and gentle way. It is vital that we learn to assess criticisms. Content and manner are the two issues at stake when seeking to assess the giving and receiving of criticism. The criticism that we give or receive may be right or wrong in the content of criticism. Additionally, it may be right or wrong in the way of its delivery.

There are essentially five categories by which we may assess the criticism that we are both called to give and receive. Criticisms may be:

(1) Altogether wrong in content and in delivery.

(2) Partially right in content but wrong in delivery.

(3) Partially right in content and right in delivery.

(4) Altogether right in content but wrong in delivery.

(5) Altogether right in content and right in delivery (This is almost never the case when giving or receiving critism).

How we assess the criticism that we are either giving or receiving is paramount to our ability to live in such a way that is pleasing to the Lord. This does not mean that it is easy to assess criticism. It is actually quite difficult for a variety of reasons. First of all, most of us want to think that others are entirely wrong whenever they bring any criticism to us. We love to turn a blind eye to our own sin. Second, most of us love to blow up over what part of a criticism might be wrong, rather than welcome what part of it is right. Third, we are all ready to write off criticisms that are brought to our attention when it comes from someone with whom we have not had a close relationship.

After learning how to assess criticism, we desperately need to learn how to then cope with criticism. In his 2008 PCRT talk, “Persevering in the Face of Criticism,” Dr. Beeke offered the following 11 solutions to this problem for Gospel-ministers who undergo severe criticism:

1. Consider Criticism Inevitable. If you are a true believer or a pastor in a true church, you can be assured that you will be the object of criticism. Beeke explained, “Dead churches don’t criticize, living churches do. Expect it. After all, Jesus said to His disciples, “Woe to you when all men speak well of you.” Be open to criticism. Criticism will come.”
2. Consider the Source. 

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