Most men will not admit their innate fear of becoming a dad and often cover their insecurity with bravado and bluster. Some devolve into angry, apathetic, or absent parents, and their children suffer the consequences. For those who profess faith and believe in a heavenly father, we have a better path laid out for us.

I have never been good with blood—seeing blood that is. So, it was probably not a great idea that, many years ago, I agreed to coordinate the blood drive at my workplace. Even more foolish was my naïve assumption that I could coordinate the event without giving blood myself. As the fateful day drew near, it became clear that my colleagues were not going to let me off the hook. After giving blood that morning, my great fear was realized when I attempted to get off the table and I fainted.

Several years later, I had to face the reality that if I were going to be in the room when my first child was born, I was going to have to see blood again. As that monumental event drew near, I realized that I was dealing with two competing fears—seeing blood and becoming a first-time father. These realities were deeply interconnected. Then, moments after my son was born, the doctor did something I was definitely not expecting or prepared for. Though I had specifically told him I was not interested in cutting the umbilical cord due to a blood phobia, without batting an eye, the doctor suddenly handed me the scissors, asking me to “hold them” for him. Then as soon as they were in my hands, he said they were no longer sterile for him to use and that I had to cut the cord. With no time to think, I accepted my responsibility and did my duty. In the end, it was not seeing blood that shook me so much, but the startling reality of becoming a father that hit me like a thunderbolt. I could cut that cord, but I felt like I had no idea how to be a father.

Most men will not admit their innate fear of becoming a dad and often cover their insecurity with bravado and bluster. Some devolve into angry, apathetic, or absent parents, and their children suffer the consequences. For those who profess faith and believe in a heavenly father, we have a better path laid out for us. We are not called to have a false confidence in ourselves or our own abilities, but rather to trust more deeply in the one who made us for this calling. Counterintuitively, we are called to be our most dependent when we feel that others need us to be the most dependable.

As we consider counseling men who want to become better fathers, it would be wise for us to consider the example that our Father God sets for us in His Word.

Our Heavenly Father Provides

Philippians 4:19 says, “And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.”

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