How often can we be charged with “darkening counsel” in conversation? We may not mean to, and I have to admit as a preacher and counselor this is something that is always on my mind when people ask me advice. Have I been listening to what’s actually going on or do I have a pre-packaged response that like a doctor I’m going to throw like spaghetti against the wall and hope it sticks?

Good Morning!

On today’s Tuesday prayer and worship help we are going to look into something that most of us are not particular good at…listening. One of the places we often go in the Bible to see where people do a lot of talking, but very little using of the ear-brain connection is the friends of Job as they try and give counsel to their friend. A bird’s eye view of the interactions between Elihu and Job beginning in Job 32, and if you read there you can witness that Job did not actually “interact” with Elihu. Elihu did all the talking, and Job all the taking.

For five chapters Elihu runs his mouth and exhibits quite a bit of ignorance in doing so. He’d started off well by waiting his turn, as should have been the case for his being the youngest of Job’s inquisitors. Yet it becomes evident that Elihu wasn’t paying any attention to what Job was saying in response to the other three friend’s questions. Elihu was still operating under a faulty understanding of who God is and what this dark providence meant for Job. It was also evident that Elihu had no intention of having Job change his mind on the subject. This comes largely because he was not listening to what Job was saying. Instead of contemplating the meat of Job’s message, Elihu was instead waiting for an opportunity to pounce and get his two cents in. He’d loaded the gun of his tongue and couldn’t wait to pull the trigger.

If we are honest with ourselves this is far too often how we engage in conversation with people. Especially if we are heatedly arguing or even if we are in some kind of informal debate, whether it be on a matter that means something or a trivial esoteric point. Pride wells up and becomes the focus of the conversation on our end. We often only care about being right and then gaining the victory rather than face the abominable consequence of just admitting to being flat out wrong. We look for weakness and probe for a crack to exploit like a lioness circling a wounded zebra. Then when opportunity comes . . . BOOM! We gain the laurels of first place. However, once we do a little after-action report in our mind it doesn’t always seem like receiving the trophy came with the blessings of the winner’s circle. There is regret, shame, though you are not likely going to let someone else see that this is the case.

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