When it comes to disagreeing with brothers over denominational issues, many of us can relate to Paul’s expression: “I do not do what I want, but often the very thing that I hate” (Rom. 7:15). We know deep down that we should engage in humble and open dialogue with the “other side”, and yet we largely dwell in the comfortable and affirming echo-chambers of our own tribe. 

If censoriousness is not a fruit of the Spirit, and uncharitable assumptions are not marks of genuine piety, then why are they so prevalent in the courts of the church, and in the recesses of our hearts? Seriously. Why are we so prone to suspicion? Why are we so swift to judge the motivations of our fellow presbyters? Why don’t we honestly discuss our differences, rather than unfairly represent them? Why don’t we assume the best of our brothers in Christ, and not the worst? Why is my own heart so slow to love those with whom I disagree, those for whom Christ died? These are important questions for us to reflect upon, especially as it concerns the future health of the Presbyterian Church in America. 

When it comes to disagreeing with brothers over denominational issues, many of us can relate to Paul’s expression: “I do not do what I want, but often the very thing that I hate” (Rom. 7:15). We know deep down that we should engage in humble and open dialogue with the “other side”, and yet we largely dwell in the comfortable and affirming echo-chambers of our own tribe. We lob impulsive (often harsh) verbal grenades on social media. We convince ourselves that no benefit will come from meeting with one another. What’s the use? It’s just easier for everyone if we simply keep our distance. But God calls us to something different, doesn’t He? That’s why I was grateful to receive an invitation to meet for dinner in Nashville, Tennessee with several PCA teaching and ruling elders from differing perspectives within our denomination. 

Other than our host, Howard Donahoe, everyone who gathered in Music City was associated with either the National Partnership or the Gospel Reformation Network — two PCA networks, among numerous others, that are seeking to foster biblical fellowship, denominational health, and mutual encouragement within our almost half-century old denomination. Many have understood these two sizable networks to be at odds with each other, that they are in different places theologically, confessionally, and philosophically. Therefore, while the gathering was in no way representative of the wider denomination and, of course, had zero ecclesiastical authority, it was still a highly beneficial meeting. Indeed, it’s always good for fellow presbyters from differing perspectives to sit down and talk to one another; and to do so “with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace” (4:2-3).

There were eight of us who gathered for dinner: Scott Sauls, Pastor of Christ Presbyterian Church, Nashville, TN; Richard Phillips, Pastor of Second Presbyterian Church, Greenville, SC; Mike Khandjian, Pastor of Chapelgate Presbyterian Church, Marriottville, MD; Jon Payne, Pastor of Christ Church Presbyterian, Charleston, SC; Bruce O’Neil, Pastor of Evangelical Presbyterian Church, Annapolis, MD; Mel Duncan, Ruling Elder at Second Presbyterian Church, Greenville, SC; David Filson, Associate Pastor of Christ Presbyterian Church, Nashville, TN; and our host and convener of the meeting, Howard Donahoe, Ruling Elder at Redeemer Presbyterian, Redmond, WA. Several of us met for the first time. I’m thankful we did.

After spending a little time getting to know one another, sharing about our families and churches, Howie asked if we could each take a turn addressing the table. As each of us shared, there was an intermingling of robust response and honest, forthright discussion, the kind I would personally like to see more of in the PCA. Scott Sauls humbly reminded us that Paul commenced his epistles with the greeting, “Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ,” and that our relationships as fellow presbyters should reflect this holy sentiment. Our relationships as brothers should be full of grace and peace. He warmly expressed that he could be happy worshipping in any one of our churches, and that he thinks we agree upon far more than we disagree upon. It was encouraging to hear that Scott is currently pouring over the writings of “three Johns” — John Calvin, John Newton, and Johnathan Edwards. Mike Khandjian underscored the importance of viewing each other as beloved brothers in God’s family (even with our different perspectives on how to rightly apply our common Confession), and not opponents. We all reflected upon the fact that our sinful hearts can easily become calloused and cynical towards those with whom we disagree. I had the privilege of sharing my testimony, how God redeemed and rescued a miserable sinner at Clemson University from the bondage and penalty of sin in the spring of 1991.     

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