In contrast, I’ve found deep comfort watching the overcoming faith of my limping friends enduring seasons of brokenness or loss. And I admit that I too have circumstances in my life that others may find uncomfortable, causing them to want to distance themselves from me. Whatever the loss, these struggles are not denials of God’s good plan for women! Any of us in such circumstances did not fall off the bandwagon of Biblical womanhood. Instead, the purity of God’s good plan for women becomes clearer as we hold on to faith in the midst of our losses.

pa·ri·ah

1. an outcast.

2. any person or animal that is generally despised or avoided.

3. a member of a low caste in southern India and Burma.
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/pariah

A few years ago, a friend in the process of divorce encouraged me to write on the topic of pariahs in the church. These are the believing women around us whose life circumstances make us uncomfortable – the Ruths and Naomis in our culture. Maybe they lost a child to death or are estranged from one in rebellion. Maybe they could never get pregnant in the first place. Perhaps their husband left them for another woman, or maybe their husband died. Perhaps they never got married and are heavily involved in their career. Whatever their life story, the thing that makes them feel like a pariah to others is that they don’t want a pariah’s life circumstances as their own. Perhaps their story plays to our fears for our own, and therefore we reject or avoid them. Of course, few would use the phrase pariah to describe someone in circumstances that we don’t want for ourselves, yet the larger church often treats women like they are outcasts if their life story doesn’t match the norm. Unspoken fears play out in real ways.

“If we embrace this divorced woman in our church, won’t other young women think divorce is an option when their marriage gets hard?”

“If we embrace this single, working mom, won’t other young moms be tempted away from raising their children at home?”

“I don’t want to enter into this widow’s suffering, because I don’t want to consider the possibility that one day I might face my own similar loss.”

In contrast, I’ve found deep comfort watching the overcoming faith of my limping friends enduring seasons of brokenness or loss. And I admit that I too have circumstances in my life that others may find uncomfortable, causing them to want to distance themselves from me. Whatever the loss, these struggles are not denials of God’s good plan for women! Any of us in such circumstances did not fall off the bandwagon of Biblical womanhood. Instead, the purity of God’s good plan for women becomes clearer as we hold on to faith in the midst of our losses. The enduring faith of “pariahs” motivates me when my own fears become my reality, and I am faced with my own unique set of circumstances that test my own faith.

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