The truly complementarian doesn’t talk about hierarchy, authority, roles and assignments but about love and relationships and how his and her strengths and gifts complement one another — making each other better and the two of them a unity…The truly complementarian talks about serving his wife the way Christ served the church and tells us stories about what he did recently for his wife.

I have been asked of late why I have posted so much about complementarianism. Beside the routine reposting of material from Christians for Biblical Equality, which often brings up the discussion, it just so happens that (1) a number of items have come my way randomly and (2) the view has been shaped into a view that is not reflective of all complementarians. Last week I posted a response to Kevin DeYoung’s TGC post about the 9Marks of complementarianism, and I finished with this:

So, no christology, no pneumatology and a whole lot of manhood. Sounds like this piece has not only leaned into culture, it has lost his way in culture. The culture of the 1950s, suburban, white.

And no eschatology: where is the kingdom of God here? the incursion of God’s reign in Christ, anticipating in the now the kingdom of God, anticipating the visions of Rev 21-22and Gal 3:28 and Col 3:11?

So, today, I thought I’d turn it all around and give my wisdom on how the “truly (male) complementarian” operates and I do so in conversation with some complementarians who have told me they are weary with the hard-core complementarian line that doesn’t reflect what the truly complementarian believe. The male complementarian view (which is not the same necessarily as the female complementarian view) is an influence as much from manhood and womanhood as it is anything else. So, today, I want to turn it all around and offer how I would see complementarianism.

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