The gospel was seen as baby stuff that got us in the door. The bigger and better stuff was up to us to achieve. This left two options. No assurance which leads to fear of not being able to measure up or being deluded into thinking you could actually do what only the Holy Spirit can. Rather than holding up the work of Christ, He was just a metaphor for my spirituality. Rather than holding up the promises of God in the Bible, these words were interpreted as being conditional on my performance rather than rock solid because they are based on God’s character. Because the gospel was minimized, sin was minimized. Rather than clinging to Christ’s work and repenting and believing, again and again, I was left to modify my behavior as best as I could. 

I am no fan of mysticism, at least the version I was exposed to. It sounded so very spiritual and even got some things partially right, but the focus was wrong.

It was hammered in time after time that I could do nothing in myself. I get that. Jesus said so Himself loud and clear. But what was the answer to this dilemma? Your only choice was to turn inward and constantly take your spiritual pulse as to whether you were “in Christ” or not. That in itself is highly problematic because “in Christ” became a vague higher spiritual plane that one strives for, NOT the act of God Almighty who justifies the ungodly. “Christ” also became a buzzword too with very little connection to Jesus as a real person. Also if God placed us “in Christ” and we can take ourselves out, what does that say about the power of man versus the power of God?

The gospel was seen as baby stuff that got us in the door. The bigger and better stuff was up to us to achieve. This left two options. No assurance which leads to fear of not being able to measure up or being deluded into thinking you could actually do what only the Holy Spirit can. Rather than holding up the work of Christ, He was just a metaphor for my spirituality. Rather than holding up the promises of God in the Bible, these words were interpreted as being conditional on my performance rather than rock solid because they are based on God’s character. Because the gospel was minimized, sin was minimized. Rather than clinging to Christ’s work and repenting and believing, again and again, I was left to modify my behavior as best as I could. This sounds like harsh criticism, but I believe it’s an accurate assessment. This is not meant against people but the teaching  (if you can call it that because nothing was systematic) that left me paralyzed for decades.

This mysticism is highly impractical, but not because theology in itself is bad. The truth is what sets us free. The Word is lamp to our feet. We hide it in our hearts so we might not sin. The problem lies when the biblical gospel is not taught and the truth of God’s Word is up for grabs because it’s “what it means to me.” Everything is an allegory where I am the star instead of God and His plan of redemption. What can you base your life on when you have an inaccurate view of who God really is and what He has done? Like I said, the focus is all wrong and this breaks my heart.

But as an antidote to all of this, my pastor preached on Galatians 2:20 this past Sunday. These are the main points from the sermon:

1. Jesus is the end of our sin. God treated Him as my sin deserved to be treated.

2. Jesus is your complete favor before God. Salvation is not a ladder we need to climb. Yes we will grow in holiness, but not in justification.

3. Jesus is indivisibly united with us. I live because He lives in me.

4. Christ is ours by faith. Not faith in my faith but faith in what God promises.

5. Jesus loves you specifically. Yes we should avoid man-centered theology, but we should not be afraid to say that Jesus loves us individually.

6. He gave Himself completely. He did not do His part with the hope that we will do ours. “It is finished” once and for all.

If you want to be encouraged in the gospel and be free from carrying this burden yourself, please listen.

Persis Lorenti is an ordinary Christian. You can find her at Tried With Fire and Out of the Ordinary. This article appeared on her blog and is used with permission.