As I plodded through doctoral studies, these realities about fatherhood sank into my bones. My wife and my children needed my sacrifice, my presence, and even my absence. But most importantly, they needed something – someone – far greater than me. They needed a sacrifice, a presence, and a provision that I could not provide.

Two years ago today, on March 6, 2020, my son Brooks was born at 6:00am, and I defended my doctoral dissertation at 3:00pm. How that situation arose is quite comical.

When scheduling the oral defense, I attempted to tip-toe around my son’s due date, March 26^th. When the defense was then scheduled for late March, I kindly requested a new date – Friday, March 6^th. This would give three weeks of buffer, plus it would be the last agenda item on a Friday afternoon. I would successfully defend, then my wife and I would celebrate with a Friday night on the town. I had it planned.

God has a sense of humor. Brooks came three weeks early, and we headed to the hospital at 1am on March 6^th. My wife was a champ – as she had been with our older two children – and she made quick work of the delivery. By 6:00am, we were holding a precious, but awfully tiny, 4 lb, 7oz boy in our arms. The doctors surmised that his growth in the womb had finished, and her body evicted him.

As the sun was coming up and shining into the post-delivery room, my wife and I realized we were on the same page about the defense. We wanted it done. No one gets to the end of a marathon, only to run one mile more. We could feel the chains unshackling, and we were bound to be set free.

During the defense that afternoon, one of my supervisors, Dr. Todd Chipman, asked what I had learned through the process. I broke down. The emotions of the day finally caught up to me.

You see, my dissertation was on the topic of fatherhood. Here I was, a new father again, defending my work about fatherhood itself.

What had I learned? Fatherhood will make a man out of you.

1. Fathering will stretch the father to the limits.

The New Testament describes a husband as standing in the metaphorical place of Christ in the marriage relationship.

Read More